If You had Your Life to live over again…

 

      We attend a house church, the first  several minutes of our time together reminds me of  ”show and tell” from  my elementary school days.  I read  the following anecdote  this  past  Sunday  on John Muir.  I prefaced it by saying, “This is where I get some of my  ideas 

    “In the last half of the nineteenth century, John Muir was our most intrepid and worshipful explorer of the western extremities of our North American continent.  for decades he tramped up and down  through our God created wonders, from the California Sierras to the Alaskan glaciers, observing, reporting, praising, and experiencing- entering into whatever he found with childlike delight and mature reverence.

     At one period during this time (the year was 1874) Muir visited a friend who had a cabin snug in a valley of one of the tributaries of the Yuba River in the Sierra Mountains- a place to venture into the wildnerness and then return for a comforting cup of tea.

     One December day a storm moved in from the Pacific- a fierce storm that bent the junipers and pines, the madronas and fir trees as if they were so many blades of grass.  It was for just such times this cabin had been built:  cozy protection from the harsh elements.  We easily imagine Muir and his host wrapped in sheepskins, safe and secure in his tightly caulked cabin, a fire blazing against the cruel assault of the elements,  Muir meditatively rendering the wildness ento his elegant prose.  But our imaginations, not trained to cope with Muir, betray us.  For Muir, instead of retreating to the coziness of the cabin, pulled the door tight, and throwing another stick of wood on the fire, strode out of the cabin into the storm, climbed a high ridge, picked a giant Douglas fir as the best perch for experiencing the kaleidoscope of color and sound, scent and motion, scrambled his way to the top, and rode out the storm , lashed by the wind, holding on for dear life, relishing Weather; takingit all in- its rich sensuality, it’s primal energy. 

      From the intro to The Wisdom Of Each Other  by Eugene Peterson/ author of The Message.

      The guy wasn’t afraid to jump in and enjoy life!  He didn’t give a rip about what other people might think of him.   The older I get,  the more freedom  I have to  live like this….I read a book several years ago  by Tim Hansel When I Relax I Feel Guilty  It planted some thoughts  that continue to bear fruit to this day in  my life…here are  those seeds…my hope is they will do the same  in you…

    ” If I had my life to live over again, I’d try to make more mistakes next time: I would relax, I would limber up, I would be sillier than I have been this trip. I know of very few things I would take seriously. I would take more trips, I would be crazier… I would eat more ice cream and less beans; I would have more actual troubles and fewer imaginary ones. You see I’m one of those people who lives life prophylactically and sensibly hour after hour, day after day. Oh, I’ve had my moments, and if I had to do it over again, I’d have more of them…”

Anonymous monk, in Tim Hansel, When I Relax I Feel Guilty

     “Do something unusual. Be an experimenter. Meet new people, try new experiences. Let people think you’re loony. Wear a funny hat or put your shirt on backwards for a day…’ Hug a tree, fly a kite, wear a button, jog in triangles. Go for a long walk in your bare feet. Poke some holes in your rigidity. This is not a time to be timid. Take a chance, it’s worth it.”

Tim Hansel, When I Relax I Feel Guilty

      Well, it’s time to call it a day.  Thanks for reading!  DM

      

How We Met

       I love to hear the stories of how couples meet!   I thought it would be fun to include our story here on the blog.      Growing up I  (DM) was  shy ….so shy, I can count on one hand the number of conversations I had with girls throughout   high school .  Laugh all you want, when you are a shy, it stinks.

       Our story started back when I was in 10th  grade  Every morning  we’d start the day in our homerooms, (grades 9th through 12th mixed).  I (DM) would sit in the front row, gnawing my pencil, ready to scoot out the door, the moment the bell rang.  (MM) (my wife), a year younger would sit in the back of the room with all of the popular kids.

     Shortly after I turned 16 I thought to myself…“If I don’t overcome some of this shyness I will wind up an old bachelor, and I don’t want to be an old backelor!”    So I did the hardest thing I’d ever done in my life before or since….I called that cute little girl from my home room up on the phone, cold turkey, out of the blue and asked her if she would go to a movie with me!

      Would you believe she said she would?     This is a good point to tell you a little more about her… her dad was a Dr.  She was  athletic.  She was so good at basketball, she was playing on the high school team her freshman year.    She was cute. (She went on to be elected the home coming queen her senior year, everyone liked her)    And here I am this shy  Iowa farm boy, setting his sights on her…what was I smoking???  (Maybe that’s why I love that corny movie  The Princess Bride farm boy marries the beautiful Princess Buttercup)

     So,  we went on that first date.   Next Monday at school, I freaked out…what next?????????MM came up behind me in the lunch line, and I froze, like a deer in a car’s head lights…didn’t say a word, just bolted out of the  lunch line and walked down town…What an idot!!!! here I was with MM obviously interested and my mind went blank….we didn’t speak to each other the rest of our days in high school…she didn’t have a clue what she had done wrong…I feeling like such a looser for being SO SHY….

      I graduated high school, overcame most of my social shyness, went out with several girls.(probably a dozen or so) …. finally got the the place where I was  SO  tired of the mind games…wasn’t particularly religious, didn’t have a spiritual bone in my body…but remember literally crying out “If anyone is listening, and if you are even out there…send me someone, because I’m tired of the mind games”.

     Two weeks later, (I was 19) Chuck, a friend of mine and I stopped into a local pizza parlor and MM  waited on us…she had went away to college but dropped out after the first quarter…  Chuck says to me ,”If you don’t ask her out, I will.”  That was all the encouragement I needed. …I did ask her out for a date, 6 months later I popped the question…and 9 months after that we tied the knot.

       OK, now you’ve heard my story…tell me yours…..  DM

When Sexual Harassment Comes Knocking

       I am a dad to 3 beautiful daughers.   They have all grown up  and moved out,  the oldest is home this week visiting with our granddaughter.   Today for the 7th time in my life I got wind that someone had sexually harassed one of them.   It takes a lot to get me angry, and this is one of those situations.  As she was coming to our house , a semi driver driving a fuel tanker began to honk and attempt to get her attention.  At first she (my daugher) thought  there was something wrong w/ her car and he was trying to get her attention. She tried to pass and he sped up the truck so she decided to get behind him  at which point, he started to slow down….this went on for several minutes until she finally got to her exit….he was still honking and making gestures as he continued on.

     I asked her if she knew the name of the trucking company..yep, it is _ _ _ _ _..the name was on the mudflaps. …so, armed with that information, I got onto the internet, typed in the name of the company, found their website and e-mailed them this note:

To Whom it may concern, Today is July 19 2007. I just got home for lunch to the news that my 27 yr old daughter was “propositioned” by one of your fuel truck drivers as he was driving North on Hwy *** between A.  and B . she said that as she was passing him (it is a divided highway) he honked at her and continued to indicate something was up. She thought maybe there was something wrong w/ her car and he was signing her to pull over….This went on for several minutes. She slowed down but eventually decided just to pass him. As she did, he made a gesture which she took to mean he wanted sex. she had out of state plates so it probably looked like she was traveling across country. I’m not sure how easy it would be to identify who the driver was, but she said it was a semi fuel truck w/**** mudflaps. Needless to say, as her dad I would like to give the trucker a piece of my mind. My daughter also was carrying my grandchiid in the car with her and the whole thing shook her (my daugher up) Any thing you can do to address this situation would be appreciated. DM

       The other 6 situations all make my bloodpressure rise if I allow myself to dwell on them.  In 4 of the other situations where the girls were harassed I took the bull by the horns and confronted someone.  A 5th situation resulted in a trip to an emergency room and a call to the police.  In the 6th case,  we didn’t do anything because of various circumstances….but nothing prepares you as a dad for this sort of thing….nothing….Anyway, this is not one of those “upbeat” positive thinking posts as much as me needing to vent………..I’m HOPING the trucking company will in fact track down the driver and he and I get to have an eyeball to eyeball visit before it’s all done.     Any  thoughts?

Encouragement For When You Feel “Inadequate”

 Week  after week,  the most hit post on my blog site is something I wrote in  March    “Help for when you feel lonely and clingy”  If you are interested, here is a link to that page, (not so much for what I wrote but for all of the great feedback)http://hearttoheart.wordpress.com/2007/04/01/help-for-when-you-feel-lonely-and-clingy/ 

     Who wants to  admit they have moments when they feel “lonely and clingy”  , and yet, even such strong personalities as Winston Churchill , Spurgeon, and Elijah the Prophet confessed to having those “black dog days” so we’re in good company if you sometimes feel down on yourself.

     Along the same line,  last month I contributed to a new blog  called “Sharing Burdens”.  Most of the time  I’m living life and loving every minute….but candidly there are moments when even I get a case of the “Ugly Duckling” .  I hate it!  So, if at some point, you are feeling like a “looser” and want to read something to encourage you check this out:  (again, not so much for what I said as for all of the great feedback)…you are not alone!

http://sharingburdens.wordpress.com/2007/06/14/a-wanna-be-swan/

     In Church last week, someone asked why in the world would someone write about this sort of stuff and share it on a blog?!!!   Here’s why I do it….because I know what it feels like to struggle w/ something and not  know  who to talk to, not know where to go to get help.  I have been fortunate enough to have several strangers come along side me to encourage me  and this is one way for me to “pay it forward.”   Thanks for reading, and thanks for your  feedback!  DM

When You Need A Hug….

      I saw this video clip last night called “Free Hugs”.  It made me laugh.  Wanted to share it with you.  If you’re needing a hug this  is the best I can do for you.   Click this link

       No I’m not a tree hugger, or the touchy feely type.   I’m more of a shake your hand type of guy.  I always tell the guys at work (construction crew)…“If you need CPR, you are going to die”  :-)     DM.