The Circle Of My Life

     “Some men draw a circle around their family, and they are the only ones they look out for, other men draw a larger circle, to include their friends and people in their area.  There are a few men however, whose circle is much larger, it is the world.”

                                              Paraphrase from a scene in  the movie 10,000 BC

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     I was walking through Walmart Tuesday night, caught a scene from a new release 10,000 BC. It hooked me.  I mentioned it in passing as my wife and I  headed for  the checkout.  (Just making conversation mind you)   This is one of the things I love about her.   she said spontaneously, “Then why don’t we get it?”

     We are not big movie goers, in fact, if we sit in front of the TV more than twice  a month, that would be stretching  it… for us to pick up a new release is not the norm.    So we set aside  Friday night to check it  out.  I  won’t spoil the story for you, but if you like intense action sequence, some violence, no sleaze, and great special effects, you’ll probably like the movie.)

     At one point,  a young man wrestles with his destiny.  A friend of his father   waxes philosophical about the “size of each man’s circle”, (the people he looks out for).  Ultimately each of us has  to decide on how big to draw that  circle.

 WOW    That is a profound thought  I told my wife. 

               There are  people who profess to be your   friend,  but let something happen involving  money,  a misunderstanding  or a wrong   committed and  you’ll  discover just how deep  that relationship really is .   

      I am thankful for the people  who have drawn a circle that includes me. 

        Anyway,  tell me about someone who has included you in their “circle” …the more details the better. 

My Friends Talk About Loneliness

 “Are you out there, Templeton?”  called Wilbur.  There was no answer.  Suddenly Wilbur felt lonely and friendless.”  Lurvey noticed that something was wrong.  Wilbur didn’t want food, he wanted love.  He wanted a friend- someone who would play with him.  Wilbur tried the goose.  “Sorry, sorry,  sorry.“   she said.  Next he tried one of the lambs.  ” Will you play with me?” he asked. “Certainly not, said the lamb. “In the first place, I cannot get into your pen.  In the second place, I am not interested in pigs.  Pigs mean less than nothing to me.”

      Friendless, dejected, and hungry, he threw himself down and sobbed.  Later that afternoon, Lurvy went to Mr. Zuckerman.  “I think there’s something wrong with that pig of yours.  He hasn’t touched his food.   so Lurvy caught him and forced the medicine down his throat.  This was certainly the worst day of his life.   He didn’t know whether he could endure the awful loneliness any more.

      Darkness settled over everything.  Soon there were only shadows and noises of the sheep chewing their cuds, and  occasionally  the rattle of  a cow-chain up overhead.  You can imagine Wilbur’s surprise when, out of the darkness, came a small voice he had never heard before.  It sounded rather thin, but pleasant.  “Do you want a friend, Wilbur?”  it said.  I’ll be  a friend to you.  I’ve watched you all day and I like you.”

    from the book Charlotte’s Web

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     This post is a group project.  I’ve written at least two  postswhile I was in the midst of feeling “lonely”  and secretly wondered how often others struggle with this emotion, and what it felt  like to them…..so I asked.  Sent out an e-mail asking these two questions…#1  Have you ever experienced loneliness for an extended period of time?  and #2  Describe what it felt like.  Word pictures would be great.  Here are portions of their letters.

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  I have indeed experienced loneliness … the crazy thing is I have been married almost eight years, yet I still have found myself ‘feeling lonely’ from time to time … I think loneliness feels like your at the bottom of a pit, that you can’t get out of … I guess you could day your in the ‘depths of despair’ … yet the thing of it is, sometimes, you don’t know why!

Thought wise, I think when you have that feeling of ‘loneliness’, you think about the things that are ‘wrong’ … the things that you can’t control … I think too, for me at least, you think about all the issues and problems in the world, which only makes matter worse, but that’s just what goes through my mind sometimes!

When I’m lonely, I listen to music usually, and I just want someone to ‘call me’ or ‘take care’ of me … I wouldn’t say I was ‘clingy’, but I would say I wanted someone or something tangible to make me feel better … sometimes praying in the midst of loneliness just doesn’t help … I know that may sound bad, but it’s the truth … you really just want someone to care enough to help you get out of your loneliness!

Anyway that’s a brief insight … hope it helps!

Lookin’ forward to the post!

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        My loneliness comes in the midst of marriage and family. My spouse may be here but only taking up space. My loneliness feels like I’m screaming into the wind. No one else hears. There is no benefit to it except I feel like I expressed myself. Just not to the person I want to hear it. Then I realize I will have to do this on my own. I move into “needs to get done mode” and move on with my life until this segment passes. I pretend he is not there nor have any expectations until I feel he has reentered our world and I can again provoke reaction. In my mind I am again screaming into the wind. To the rest of the world, it appears as a vulnerable conversation and I am congratulated for my communication skills. It would be more fun to scream.

P.S. sorry for the darkness; I’m surprised myself at what I really feel about this. Thanks for including me.

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Have you ever experienced lonelinessfor an extended period of time? Yes I’m there.  I feel it even when my husband is home.  For what ever reason, generating a meaningful two way conversation is next to impossible.  Maybe we’ve been together so long we’ve run out of things to talk about OR maybe we’re both too introverted.  Maybe he’s all talked out and I’m not.

Describe what that felt/ feels like.  Word pictures  would be great.
It HURTS! I feel rejected.  God gave me as a gift to him but I feel like he won’t open the present.

What were the thoughts that were going through your mind?
I’m afraid…. afraid that we will drift apart and when the nest is empty there will be nothing left between us.  My parents divorced after us kids left and his parents are married living separately.
I’m also afraid that maybe I don’t spend enough time with God and that I wouldn’t feel this way so much if I did. I wish that he would spend more time with God too.  If we could get closer to God than maybe we would feel closer to each other. But aside from going to church every Sunday, he seems disinterested in spiritual matters.  Then I have to pick up the spiritual ball in our family and it feels wrong but somebody’s got to do it.

What did you think/ say to yourself?
I realize that Genesis tells us that God created us to be together.  That desire was installed in man by God.  That God sent me to be his helpmate and maybe some day he will let me help him, but for now I wait.

Were you clingy?
It almost seems that the more I want to be with my husband the more turned off he is. I have actually said when I feel like he doesn’t want to talk to me, “I’ll find someone else to talk to.” Friends are energizing and rarely at a loss for words, but God is ALWAYS there.  My favorite hymn is What A Friend We Have in Jesus.

 

        Ah, this is something I’ve been considering writing about myself.  For the last year or so there’s been a group of Christian artists (local and non) who have been meeting and experiencing similar sensations of isolation and desperation.  This sense is what a friend of mine has started referring to as “the void”, the place where God’s spirit floated over the waters before time began.  The void has become a symbol for the seed in the ground, that time of spirit-death that has to be achieved to birth greater life.  It’s odd, because all of us feel like we are in the void even though most of us have families at home and a lot of inter-connectedness to other people.  But the void is real for us.  When we want to create we go to our inner wells and feel nothingness.  When we’re in our quiet times searching for God’s voice it’s like we’re in huge echoing caverns.  Our faith is intact and as vibrant as ever, maybe made more vibrant by our desperation, but it feels like we’re constantly scraping the bottom of the barrel to just get by.In America we like to believe in the prosperity doctrine, but prosperity is only useful when tempered with need.  If we always prospered, what good would come from faith?  So God, being a loving God, sends us plenty in one hand and emptiness in the other, so we taste both.  And I believe that this internal loneliness is an important part of God preparing us for a great work.Lately when I feel the void I also feel something like rushing winds or waters, and I get excited because I know that the seed is taking root and this time in my spiritual journey is coming to an end.  Like a pregnant woman I am becoming bored with my state and I am covetous of the morning that I will be able to take hold of what has been growing, to look at it and know it fully.So I drink the bitterness of spiritual isolation as well as the sweet mead of hope.  Both of them, together.And as odd as it may be, I am contented.Best of wishes with your journey._________________________________________________________________  

 First, I apologize for not getting right back to you on this, but it has been a bit crazy!
Anyway—yes, I do understand what you’re saying and feeling. In addition to being appreciated, etc, I think when I feel lonely I also have a feeling of “unimportance” (not a word, but think you’ll understand it). I turn onto my needs and begin to think “why isn’t anyone calling me? they don’t think about me. I’m not important enough to them for them to think of me”I don’t get clingy at all. In fact, my response is withdrawal. When I begin to feel this way, I get sucked into myself and look at every thing that anyone says to me, read into all actions, and most definitely misinterpret everything anyone says with a bias against me.There are other times when I feel lonely but it is just a sadness. It’s not a self-worth issue or anything like above, it just is what it is—alone and that feels sad. As I’ve moved forward in healing and understanding who I am in God’s eyes and having an honest look of myself, loneliness is more this than anything else…just sadness. The “good” part of this though is that it’s tolerable—not “destructive”.Hope that adds to what you were thinking about and “chewing on”. Hang in there—you are continuing to move forward!!______________________________________________________________________________

        It took me awhile to reply this cos I had to think it over.Loneliness….I think I’ve been lonely for most of my life. In  my immediate family, we are 5 of us: my dad, mum, 2 brothers and moi. My mum and dad had each other; same for my brothers so most times I was left to myself. But I didnt mind too much, I was a tom boy anyway.As I grew older, the loneliness became more intense. I had a variety of friends but… I grew up mostly around adults – most of the time, my brothers and I were the only kids around. So I was older than a lot of my friends psychologically. That aside, I’ve always been acutely tuned to those around me. I am very sensitive Doug…from an email I can tell how my friend is feeling. So I always knew when those around me were sad or depressed or excited no matter how hard they hid it. But it was so not reciprocal…no one even seemed to care! So I turned to novels and my journal.It’s not like I did not want to cling…but I treasured my independence even more. Even now, I’d be cuddling with my fiance and I’m overcome by this intense loneliness…its like a dark abyss or a black hole. I just push it down and try to ignore it. Later, when I’m alone, I bring out my journal and start to scribble. I write letters to God… I call my mum and just say hi. If anyone cared to look into my soul, they’d know that I’m slowly being consumed by loneliness. I cope because I find myself more and more having long conversations with God..that keeps my sanity.

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Loneliness…….ugh……it can hit you in the pit of the stomach….. For me it showed its ugly head in aloneness.  I know in my heart when we are God’s child we are never alone, but the loneliness came. 

I needed help of some kind and yes, the answer came in a most unusual way.    

Before  my mate of 60 years, went to be with the LORD, I had never spent a night alone.  After this took place the evening hours brought such aloneness, such emptiness.  I like the old song that goes “No, never alone, No never alone……He promised never to leave me, never to leave me alone.”  As a believer, I knew God was with me and would help me, friends were wonderful as were family to come or call…….yet

 

that debilitating aloneness would sneak in.  In the daylight itwas nice to hear the cars going through the lane, a sound near the garage or the lawn being mowed….neat reminders and they were treasured, but when evening came and he wasn’t here, that terrible empty, lonely feeling showed its ugly head.  Without having made a conscious decision to do so, I began to turn on the TV to his favorite ball game or program, and remember him sitting in his favorite chair.  It sounds strange, but as I would read in the dining room or do the things I used to do in the evening, I no longer felt unattached, I felt close to my husband  and my heavenly Father.  The evenings have since been enjoyable and I am so thankful to God for His unfailing love and peace

You know DM, sometimes you scare me with what you write, because so many times I am battling the exact thing you talk about.  Loneliness and alone, two very different things yet so alike. I can feel alone in a room full of people, and lonely for family , friends and love, companionship, communication when I am home alone. Yet content to be alone for a while.  This is probably confusing, I know I have been writing this down, and I confuse myself. I know something is missing in my life, and it’s a closeness,a sense of self and self-worth, security and trust that I need but not sure what or how I need to do to be okay, starting with me, let alone relationships with others.  I know I cut my self off from people, let very few get close to me, and love my friends and family very much. Sorry if this makes no sense, but it’s hard for me to explain sometimes.   But for once I made myself get back to you.

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I could write you a book on loneliness but will refrain from that. I’ll try to just hit the high points instead.Losing someone so close to me was the worst thing that has ever happened. It left me searching for a “normal” life again that I haven’t yet found. When a piece of your life is missing there is no way to fix it you have to instead learn to deal with it. I’ve found a new normal that at this time includes a “continuous” loneliness. I can occupy my mind on other things or people at times but loneliness becomes the person I lost when no one else is around.    In the midst of my grief and loneliness I was uncertain, for I had lost my councilor, I felt abandoned, I needed to be needed, because as a wife and mother I was the “caretaker” and now all there was to care for was me and to me that was selfish. My future was gone, you’re not supposed to be widowed at 42…you’re supposed to be nearing a time of life when the nest is becoming empty and the focus can turn back to just enjoying your spouse and life, and instead, I’m trying to make sense of what has happened and find something, anything, to make life livable again. I spent many hours trying to focus on what I have, not what I have not. The power of loneliness has taught me something about the power of love. The more intense you love, the more intense the loneliness when they are gone.I had to work hard at not getting “clingy” as you call it. I always keep in mind that most of my friends haven’t been in my shoes and can’t comprehend the depth of my loneliness so I try to be sensitive to their feelings when in the presence of others. Sometimes “lonely” is just my“friend” and no one else’s. Getting “clingy” was not something I could do. I wallow in self pity from time to time but then remind myself how I’ve faced some HUGE challenges and been able to find the strength to get through them.   Loneliness follows me to remind me to keep moving or it can swallow me up but I will find the strength to keep it at bay………..because I have to, life goes on for me and I’m to live it as God intended._________________________________________________________________ 

     I (DM) had  a couple of other replies as well to this survey, but I’m having serious trouble including them on this post.  This is my fifth attempt to put this together.  The computer keeps  acting up when I paste their replies to me..so I apologize in advance to those of you who wrote and don’t see your notes here….if you feel comfortable, please write a commment and that way it will be included in this for future readers. Thank you each for sharing so honestly from your lives. DM       

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Update 10/1/2012  Here’s a beautiful poem I came across on Loneliness from a fellow blogger …

I finally understand

why they left, and how

it feels to become untethered,

loosed

from life

from love.

Every one, all

off on their own

and you

left alone

where alone digs a hole

deeper and deeper

until hollowness resounds

and pain echoes

echoes in

that cavern

when all you want

is another

all you want

is to love and be loved

but it’s

a retreating

need.

You reach, you hope, you

can almost taste

but there is no one there

to take your hand or meet your lips

and you realize though you are happy

in your solitary times

happy cannot be its own champion.

This hollow

is temporary,

you know

as they did not

as they could not

shed

this feeling of

gnawing

emptiness,

but you find

it is a gift

of understanding

of light

of empathy

as long as it remembers

to go away.

Gracie Read Us Charlotte’s Web Today

“Find something you love to do and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.”

      I love my job.  Let me  tell you about today.

       We started a new project this morning for Dan and Kristina.  I’d built a deck with Kristina’s assistance 7 years ago- had lots of fun, so when they called  this Winter with ice dam problems,  I said I’d look at it.          When I bid on the project,   I offered to compensate them if they wanted to help (they loved the idea)    At break  I mentioned the latest member of our household…Winston the pig.

      Kristina exclaimed, “I”ve always wanted a pet pig!”  I told her she was the 4th woman to tell me that in the past two weeks..what is it about girls and pet pigs I keep thinking to myself.

   I told her “Winston  has her own face book page now…and already has  4 friends.”   she laughted….

Here is her picture on facebook:

   And here  is Winston’s Facebook address : http://www.facebook.com/people/Winston_Randolph/1316415757

     I asked Kristina if they had a copy of Charlotte’s Web I could borrow because  a friend  told me yesterday I needed to read it now that I have a pig.  (I’ve never read it before).  Kristina sent her 9 yr old daughter Gracie into the house to look for it. She found it..she needed something to do so I asked if she would mind reading some of it to us as we worked.     The roof is relatively flat, so she came up the ladder, [lopped down at the top and started reading… we were treated to  the first three chapters  of  Charlotte’s Web before lunch. 

    There was another   roofing crew working on a house diagonally from where we were.   They were listening to shock radio and we were listening to Gracie

      I have a great crew …both of them are working machines  with great attitudes. 

    When I hire someone, there two things I’m looking for…. attitude and the willingness to work.  If I’m going to spend 8 hours  a day with you as a co-worker (more waking  hours on a week day than with  my wife), then you’d better not be someone with a dark cloud hanging over your head.  
 

     If you’re on facebook and would like to  be a friend of Winston- don’t hesitate to ask.  I’m sure she would  love to approve you.   

500 year Flood Plain Evacuation In Cedar Rapids Iowa Today

 

Update 6/14/08

      This is the picture on the front of the Cedar Rapids Gazette from Friday the 13th 2008

     The flood water crested at 11 feet above the previous record. 

       Iowa weather has been in the national news now for a couple of weeks.  We had an F 5 tornado hit the North Central part of the state two weeks ago. 

    Here’s a chart I pulled of the Internet describing tornado sizes:

The Fujita Scale

F-Scale Number	Intensity Phrase	Wind Speed	Type of Damage Done
F0	Gale tornado	40-72 mph	Some damage to chimneys; breaks branches off trees; pushes over shallow-rooted trees; damages sign boards.
F1	Moderate tornado	73-112 mph	The lower limit is the beginning of hurricane wind speed; peels surface off roofs; mobile homes pushed off foundations or overturned; moving autos pushed off the roads; attached garages may be destroyed.
F2	Significant tornado	113-157 mph	Considerable damage. Roofs torn off frame houses; mobile homes demolished; boxcars pushed over; large trees snapped or uprooted; light object missiles generated.
F3	Severe tornado	158-206 mph	Roof and some walls torn off well constructed houses; trains overturned; most trees in fores uprooted
F4	Devastating tornado	207-260 mph	Well-constructed houses leveled; structures with weak foundations blown off some distance; cars thrown and large missiles generated.
F5	Incredible tornado	261-318 mph	Strong frame houses lifted off foundations and carried considerable distances to disintegrate; automobile sized missiles fly through the air in excess of 100 meters; trees debarked; steel re-inforced concrete structures badly damaged.
F6	Inconceivable tornado	319-379 mph	These winds are very unlikely. The small area of damage they might produce would probably not be recognizable along with the mess produced by F4 and F5 wind that would surround the F6 winds. Missiles, such as cars and refrigerators would do serious secondary damage that could not be directly identified as F6 damage. If this level is ever achieved, evidence for it might only be found in some manner of ground swirl pattern, for it may never be identifiable through engineering studies

      Today on the local radio, they were calling for evacuations in Cedar Rapids Iowa (about 45 minutes from us)   They said  they were evacuating people on the 500 year flood plain…here is an excerpt from the local weather website: 

Flood Warning

WGUS83 KDVN 111546 FLSDVN FLOOD STATEMENT NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE QUAD CITIES IA IL 1046 AM CDT WED JUN 11 2008 ...A HISTORIC HYDROLOGIC EVENT IS EVOLVING. ..UNPRECEDENTED RIVER CRESTS ARE EXPECTED... .RECORD FLOODING IS EXPECTED ON THE CEDAR AND IOWA RIVERS IN EASTERN IOWA. THIS IS A SERIOUS SITUATION.

 RIVER FORECASTS TAKE INTO ACCOUNT PAST PRECIPITATION...AS WELL AS
 PRECIPITATION AMOUNTS EXPECTED 24 HOURS INTO THE FUTURE FROM THE
 FORECAST ISSUANCE TIME.

 SAFETY MESSAGE...IF YOU ENCOUNTER A FLOODED ROADWAY...TURN AROUND
 AND FIND AN ALTERNATE ROUTE. TURN AROUND...DON/T DROWN.
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    I've gotten 1 phone call and 3 e-mails from some of you checking on us...I feel 
loved     
We're fine,   We live on the 2nd highest point in our county..so if the waters get 
this high  then we're all in trouble (Think Noah)
     On a personal note, we've been able to work most days.  I am in construction as 
some of you know.  My next project is shingling an existing home.  With rain in 
the forecast, I'm not in a big hurry to start. 
    Our home phone connection isn't working right now.  I think it is due to the
excess water in the ground.  This has happened before...so if you want to get a hold
of us, drop us an e-mail or call my cell.  I'm posting this mostly to let those of 
you that know us, know we're fine, amd things are pretty much normal. DM
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Update 6/13/08
I (DM) ran to Cedar Rapids today to pick up some roofing material. The Menards 
store is a few miles away from the flooding.  I called a head to make sure they 
were open- yep, open for business.  Wasn't sure what to expect.  I noticed just 
a couple of things as a result of the flooding-  they had portable generators 
for sale (in stock) and just as we were leaving the electricity in the store 
went out..their portable  generator kicked in a couple of seconds later.  Other
 than that, things were normal. Water is still rising in the Coralville Iowa area.
 In fact, on the radio today they said they expect the river down there to rise
 another 5 feet.  The weather forecast is predicting next week to dry off and 
cooler...so I scheduled a shingle delivery for Tuesday after lunch.  I guess it
 really depends where you are located, even in Eastern Iowa.  If you're stopping 
by the blog after googling this flood and have any specific questions- don't
hesitate to ask. DM

Our Pig

 

The pig is held in ill repute; 

He’s thought to be a coarse- grained brute.

A slur-per  up of slops, the swine, 

 He’s never asked indoors to dine.

But if the loathsome pig were fed,

On Marzipan and fine white bread,

And if he were allowed to shower,

and dust himself with flour,

And spend a week in Canner Or Florence,

Would we still hold him in abhorrence?

Or would we find ourselves recanting,

And crying: “Oh Pig, thou art enchanting!”

 

From the book: Consider the Lemming by Jeanne and William Steig

(given to me by my eldest )

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     Winston  came to live with us  May 27th.    She  was  weened two weeks previous.   I’ve been concerned Oscar (our beagle) would eat her when we were not home so she’s been in the barn.  She has  plenty of food, water, things to play with, a heat lamp and straw.  What more could a pig want?   

     She went from “approachable” to ”don’t touch me” in 10  days.  This morning I took her over to  a fenced in area with  lots of plants .  When I checked on her at lunch she  had this  contented look in her eyes  as if to say…” I love my new place! ”

  

   I grew up on a  farm, but I was still amazed and the radical transformation in Winston’s attitude in just an hour. 

 Caused me to wax philosophical……..

    A change of location can do wonders to a pig’s attitude.

     Fences are for the pig’s protection….you never know what is outside that fence that would love to eat you

    Pigs need space to run and play.

    

     

     

   

       Winston in her new surroundings

 

      

Christmas Eve With Sid And Marie

     It was Christmas Eve 1986.  1000 miles from home with 3 young children.  I’ll never forget the kindness of Sid and Marie, an older couple in our church that invited us to spend the evening with them…just like we were part of their family. 

(side note : It was experiences like this that gave me a whole new appreciation for hospitality and being sensitive to opportunities to reach out)

     After supper (before we played a mean game of “spoons”), Sid asked me to follow him into the living room.  He took me over to a book case and pointed at several three ring binders.  “Do you know what those are?  You need one….probably several.” 

     I looked at him with a blank “duu” look on my face. 

      He continued:  “With your abilities and gifts, you need to be your own boss.  Not as a sole proprietor,  but as a corporation.”

      To be honest, , he could have been talking Chinese.   I didn’t understand  what he was talking about,  it all seemed so complicated and beyond me.   but a seed had been planted.

     Flash forward to a weekend workshop with Lowell Lundstrom….he said:

      There are only so many hours in the day, and if you get paid by the hour (even if it’s $150 an hour) there is a limit to what you can earn, where as if you use your mind, there is no limit to what you can earn. 

        Another seed was planted

(foot note: at the time I was making $8.00 per hour  it’s not about the money- I have a very detached attitude about $ and I’m not chasing the almighty dollar.)

     This morning I  read this post  by Sanity Found – it triggered a memory of my conversation with Sid.  As I sit here this morning, both of those conversations have born fruit in my life. 

     As I told Sanity Found this morning,  while I completely understand the importance of higher education  and  needing those various pieces of paper behind your name in order to get a job in some circles, there are other options.   (I’m not looking for comments on the pro’s and con’s of higher education..read the link above for an in depth discussion of that topic and comment there if you want)

      Some of you reading this understand corporations better than I do so feel free to jump in or correct me.   We do have a corporation- it owns an apple orchard, a bed and breakfast, has published 2 books, and overseas a construction company.   It owns a riding lawn mower that I (as the president of the corporation) use to mow the property.  The corporation has an office in the same building as our bed and breakfast. (Our home)  That means a percentage of the utilities, taxes  insurance and Internet expenses  are tax deduct able.  There’s lots more I could tell you about, but I think you get the idea. 

 ”Work smarter, not harder.”

 

    

“Cross Pollination” Of The Arts Around Our Farm Kitchen Table

     I had to say good-by To Katie and Emily this morning.    Rather than me repeat who Katie and  Emily are, take a minute to read this post from my “I also live on a farm” blog.    Pictured above (from the left) are Katie Sawicki,  my daughter Rebekah, and Emily Stanback.  We were celebrating Rebekah’s birthday last night and I’d asked Katie and Emily if they wouldn’t mind putting on a small house concert as part of the party.  They spent two days  with us recharging their batteries for the final push of a three  week of a tour to promote Katie’s newest album Time Spent Lost. 

       Here’s a link to Katie’s myspace blog to check out what we were treated to last night.  

      This morning over coffee we continued our discussion on my latest “raw” idea.   Let me back up.  When we originally came up with the idea of having a bed and breakfast at our place, I had this picture of an author  (poet, artist, musician) coming away for a time to write (paint, compose, create)  We’re situated in the rolling hills of Eastern Iowa…definitely off the beaten path.   As recently as just a couple of weeks ago, I was talking with an artist about coming here to paint.  I shared that with Katie and Emily.   They both agreed we have the perfect setting.

      “Can’t you just see  an artist here in residency and maybe an author, or songwriter  whose experiencing “writers block”   sitting around the kitchen table, bouncing ideas off each other….” a cross pollination” of  the arts“  someone  said.

     I mentioned  exploring the possibility of applying for a non-profit 501 (c) (3) status which would open up the possibility for grant money.  (I looked into it a year ago but at the time, it didn’t seem practical)   Katie suggested if there was a way to weave some teaching/instruction  with a local school that would enhance the idea.    There is a local community college here that I’m sure would be open to having  some type of working relationship with us and visiting instructors.     

     In March Lou Brown, Bob, and Aimee spent three days with us.  They are  musicians from the UK who needed a place to regroup between shows.   Lou told us that her time here was  so  nurturing and refreshing…here’s what she said:

      ”  There is something about your place I find difficult to describe, it is not only that  you are truly a special and wonderful family, it is not that it is a beautiful location, it is not that there is a deck overlooking the corn fields, there is something embedded in your place that for me instantly allows me to feel safe, at peace and relaxed.  The land on which that house stand seems to be blessed with love and security.” 

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Update 6/4/08

        I woke up this morning thinking about these things. 

     Just like our music festival has evolved over time as we’ve evaluated what we’re doing…so too these ideas will undoubtedly evolve. 

This is a biggie…… I’m not interested in the financial angle as much as encouraging a tired weary musician or someone just looking to recharge their batteries emotionally.  

     Secondly, it’s definitely  word of mouth rather than try to formally make something happen (advertise or  make sure there is aways a diversity of visitors in the mix.)   Since I do bring a spiritual component to this I have a sense of anticipation.

     Your thoughts?