Welcome back! (DM here) My guest blogger series is winding down. If you’re reading this and would like to be a guest- please leave me a comment on the blog, I would love to talk to you more about it. I promise to get back to you . Alright, today’s guest is non other than Michael- mssc54. I’ve appreciated getting to know him the past few months. One thing I will tell you, is both he and his wife have a big heart for hurting children. At this point, Michael comes to the podium and begins.
Here’s a picture of Michael with the whole clan:
I was born second in the birth order of six children to Catholic, Cajun parents. Each of the first four children were born within eleven months of the previous sibling’s birth. The final two were spaced out a bit (no pun intended). My brother didn’t come along until I was thirteen years old. My dad was the proverbial traveling salesman (in every since of the term).
So basically, I felt like I was being brought up in a girl’s dormitory. I mean we had a ranch style four bedroom one and a half bath house. If I allow myself I can still see all those panty hose and bras hanging from the shower rod and various hanging apparatuses in the bathroom.
I went into the Navy when I was seventeen years old. After a nine month cruse around the Mediterranean Sea with five thousand of my closest friends I met my Mrs. serving up ice cream at the local Dairy Queen in Jacksonville, FL. She was sixteen when we met in December of 1973. She turned seventeen the following March and we married in May. I was nineteen. We both had a lot of growing up to do. Admittedly, she was ahead of me in every area of life. I was just a young, immature sailor and she was a young, beautiful, vivacious, energetic, beautiful, vivacious girl. NO mom she wasn’t pregnant.
Those early years of marriage were both scary, fun and full of everything you can imagine about teenagers being married in Florida. Use your imagination.
Just a few months after we were married her father (who was also in the Navy) was transferred to San Diego. I often wonder what the heck they were thinking letting their nearly sixteen year old daughter get married?! Not on my watch mister!!
After I was seriously injured playing softball for the Navy (no kidding) we ended up (ironically) for follow-up treatment in the same home town that she had grown up in and that her father/family had been transferred back to. Bonus… for her. Her family also was Catholic with four girls and two boys. Interesting coincidence.
I got out of the Navy after seven years that seemed like twenty. The Mrs. had been working in the fast food industry so I just collected unemployment for a few months before taking advantage of my ten bonus points for being a Veteran and went to work for the government.
It might be pertinent to admit that while I was in the Navy I developed an absolute love of alcohol and drugs. Mostly real good pot. I kept a steady muggle head because of the amount of herb I smoked.
After six years of marriage we had our first daughter. I didn’t see any reason to stop doing drugs when the Mrs. got pregnant. After all (I reasoned) I wasn’t the one who was pregnant. My drug and alcohol life style really began taking a toll on our life. I just couldn’t see what the big deal was. I mean I was working every day. I was selling more pot than I was smoking and making good money at it too! So what was the big deal. However, I wanted to be a good daddy to my little girl so I would NEVER get high in front of her. I would always go over to Greg’s house to catch a buzz. One day I hollered to the Mrs. “I’m gunna go over to Greg’s. I’ll be back later.” Now here was the absolute defining moment of me even considering that maybe… just maybe I had a drug and alcohol problem. When I hollered to my Mrs. that I was going over to Greg’s my little four year old daughter stood in front of the door, cocked her little hip to one side, put her little hand on her hip, looked me in the eye and said, “Daddy, I thought you said you were going to stop doing that?” My little girl could see clearly that I was the problem and not the world!
Not long after that I entered an in patient drug and alcohol treatment facility the VA had available. That was in March of 1984 and I’ve been clean/sober since then.
You know, (in my mind’s eye) I can still see my little girl standing in front of me and that door. Thank God for little girls!
By now my Mrs. entered a program at the Navy Ship Yard to become the top of her class (for women) to become a Nuclear Shipfitter. Heck she had her picture on the front cover of the Base paper and everything. Most guys didn’t like women coming into their turf. She loved her work and would even “unwrap” the nuclear reactors in the submarines when they would come back from patrol. Unwrapping a reactor means they would have to remove layers of lead sheets from around the reactor. When talk of all the base closings began she started going to school at night and on weekends to get her degree to become a teacher. By that time we had all three daughters. Me and the girls became quite close. We would do everything together and would even go half way across the country to visit relatives while mom stayed back home to take care of her schooling.
Somewhere along in there I quite the government work and bought an international carpet cleaning franchise. We enjoyed the money, the people and most of all the flexibility. The trick is to not let the work become your life and still make enough money to provide for the family. It’s not always easy and at times can be quite difficult. (Right DM?)
However, just because I had stopped doing the drugs, drinking and owned my own business doesn’t mean that I was a good husband. In fact I was quite a jerk a lot of the time. But I was a good daddy (I rationalized). Jerk.
I ended up getting myself into such a life altering situation that it is (to this day) difficult for me to imagine the pain and embarrassment I put my wife and girls through. I’m not going to go into the nasty details but it was right were I had to be in order to finally totally surrender my will to His will.
I can’t remember the number of times I made that Monty Hall – Let’s Make a Deal thing with God. Oh God, if You will just get me out of this mess I promise I will…
Finally I was ready to make real change. I remember the exact moment I accepted Jesus into my heart. The man who lead me to the Lord told me at that moment that he had never felt the power of the Lord so strong. He felt like Satan had lost a general in his army. Wow! Fortunately I had enough of my addictive personality left in me that I was all out for the Lord. As I sit here now I can remember that complete and total sense of peace that swept over me that moment. Don’t get me wrong, I was still in deep trouble but it didn’t bother me in the least. I was consumed with reading and studying my bible. I was like a dry sponge that was dropped into a pale of water. That is when my gift of intercessory prayer was exposed. I used to have a three ringed binder with names of people and the specific things to pray for/about for each individual/family. I guess after about six months or so the Lord saw that I was serious about Him this time and all the trouble I had (wrongly) been accused of went away.
During this time me, the Mrs. and our three young daughters got involved in a non-denominational church. Each one of us eventually got involved in the children’s ministry. As a matter of fact for about three years we would go to the nine o’clock service and then work in the infant’s nursery during the eleven o’clock service. This church had about two thousand members. I remember one Easter Sunday we had TWENTY-THREE INFANTS!! We all developed a special place in our hearts for infants.
Which is exactly why we got a call from our church over six years ago. Since my Mrs. was out of school for the summer would we consider helping out this dad who was raising a four month old infant on his own. So we would go over at six fifteen in the morning, pick the baby up and bring her home in the evening about the same time. Some times we would keep her over night and on the weekends.
We all (me. the Mrs. and our three bio-daughters) had no idea that that summer would lay the ground work for us adopting that four month old little girl when she was four… along with her two year old brother.
There is so much more but you have to visit my blog for more. I’ve imposed on DM’s generosity enough for now.
Thanks DM for considering me as a guest.
Here are some additiona photo’s Michael sent in:
Please give a big blogging welcome to Lawyerchik!!!! At this point, Lawyerchik, clears her throat, gets up from her chair, looks over to Enola, who gives her the thumbs up and begins….
